Troilism is a paraphilia in which the erotic interest of the individual focuses on watching one’s romantic partner engage in a sexual encounter with a third party, sometimes while hidden. For instance, husband watching his wife have intercourse with another man. This is considered to be part of the swinger lifestyle and may vary depending on the participants. Usually, two parties are related to each other and the third party is an outsider, who can also be a stranger to the couple. Most of the time the couple is separated, but the third party can also be the observer.

Paraphilias are a group of persistent sexual behavior patterns in which unusual objects, rituals or situations are required for sexual satisfaction. Although mild forms of these conditions probably have occurred in the lives of many normal people, a paraphilic person is distinguished by the insistence and relative exclusivity with which his or her sexuality focuses on the acts or objects in question without which orgasm is often impossible.

In troilism, the sexual arousal and excitement is gained after watching one’s romantic partner having sex with a third party. It does not normally interfere with the rights of others, except in an incidental way such as asking the partner to have intercourse with someone else against their wish. This may lead to various legal complications and may prove fatal for the individual’s interpersonal relationships.

The term troilism was coined in 1941 edition of Dorland’s Medical Dictionary where it uas classified as a paraphilia.

Treatment:

One of the most prominent problems in the treatment of this disorder is that most individuals with troilism do not seek professional treatment for the condition, but rather receive it only when they have been caught in the act or on request of their sexual partner. Thus, their motivations for change may often stem from a desire to do it for someone else rather than from a genuine desire to change.

Treatments that combine cognitive and behavioral elements have been moderately successful in effecting changes in deviant arousal and behavior patterns of fetishists. Moreover, there is increasing evidence that these treatments can result in significantly reduced rates of recidivism than seen in untreated individuals.

Another key component of treatment involves techniques commonly known as aversion therapy— aversive conditioning to deviant sexual fantasies. Other important forms of treatment comprise of cognitive behavioral programs that include social skills training and restructuring cognitive distortions that may be helping to maintain the deviant sexual arousal and behavior patterns.